Slow down Mama… you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Ok, I totally get it sometimes it feels like the pressure of the world is on your shoulders, am I right? There’s work, school drops, homework, after school activities, cooking, cleaning, and in my case I’ve the dog to take for a walk, and college work to do…

And on top of all that I need to try and eat right and exercise too?! Ahhhh my head could just explode thinking of it all but in the paraphrased words of Billy Joel “slow down mama, you’re doing fine, you can’t do everything you need to do at one time.”

You know what, I get it: when you prioritise yourself you feel “selfish”, and almost like a crappy mum. But if you take one thing from this article, let it be that put simply you cannot be a good mum unless you pour the same level of love and energy into you as you would your children, your family or friends.

If like me the whole self-love and prioritizing yourself don’t come easy, follow these simple steps I will lay before you today.

1. Exercise and eating right.

Ok…ok… please don’t hate me for this one. But when I tell you exercise, and diet completely transform your attitude of the day I’m not kidding. Don’t get me wrong I’m no Mr. Olympia and I can have days where I eat my body weight in junk, and I may or may not have an unhealthy addiction to red bull but when I know I’ve eaten clean and done some form of physical activity man do I feel on top of the world. Even if you can only squeeze in a twenty-minute walk - whatever it is, it’s always better than nothing.

TOP TIP: I read this somewhere and its amazing advice, if you’re going to do a workout do it in the morning, or you punish yourself twice. Once in the actual doing of said activity and twice by spending your day torturing yourself just thinking about it.

2. I don’t know who needs to hear this one but wash your damn hair.

I get it, when you have little people to look after, a house to clean, supper to cook, clothes to iron and you feel you don’t have time to prioritise your appearance but trust me when I tell you the ten minutes you spend on washing your hair will be worth its weight in gold.

Washing your hair is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Not only does it make you look good, but it also makes you feel good. There’s nothing like the feeling of fresh and clean hair on your scalp. It’s basically a mini spa treatment for your head. It boosts your mood, your energy, and your confidence.

TOP TIP: The five second rule, I will be honest I’m a little hypocritical because I don’t apply this logic as much as I would like to. But when I use it boy do I get productive things done. So, do not spend more than 5 seconds procrastinating about the task at hand because once you spend longer than 5 seconds thinking about the actual doing- you won’t bother doing it.

3. Set your alarm at least 30 minutes before your kids get up

I promise- you really will feel great, BUT if you have a baby or a toddler you might as well keep scrolling as their typical morning wake up time works a little like a yoyo. However, if your kids do typically get up at around say 7 every morning even just set your alarm to 6.30.

Give yourself thirty minutes of time to be all about you (heck you might like this one so much you decide you want longer to yourself). One rule is you can’t use this time for pouring energy into anyone but you!! I know that might sound impossible, but you’ll start to enjoy it. You can do anything that will help make you a happier mama whether that be a quick workout, having your breakfast in peace, reading, or even if its to scroll social media, just make sure it’s something you get joy from.

For mental health purposes scrolling socials probably isn’t the most productive method for self-care and clearing your mental workload, but let’s face it we all love a scroll. This time to yourself will allow you to be in a better mood for the rest of the day and make sure the grogginess has worn off by the time the kids wake up.

TOP TIP: If you’re struggling try go to bed 30 minutes earlier… But if you’re anything like me and no matter how long or how little you sleep for you still feel like Sid the sloth wakening up and almost falling out of the tree when your alarm goes off I’m afraid you’ll have to suck it up and ‘JUST DO IT’.

4. Write down a positive affirmation and tell yourself it every morning.

Wow… I can almost feel the scepticism on this one. But in all seriousness, I used to always tell my kids stuff like “what you think about, you become”, “speak to yourself with kindness”, but I would never follow this logic myself. And let’s face it, your words really have an impact on your mood, thoughts, and general outlook of the day.

You know when the “lucky girl” trend was booming on TikTok? That’s when I adopted this one to my life. I often think “I am healthy, I am wealthy, I am divine, everything comes to me at the perfect time”. If you want to manifest good things for your life, you truly need to believe it.

TOP TIP: Google has millions of positive affirmations. Find one that really resonates with you. And you know, you might feel a little lame to start with, but keep at it. Because if you can control your negative thinking, you can start to get a grip on the rest of your life.

5. DO YOUR SKINCARE.

Look do you want to have healthy, glowing, and beautiful skin? Then do your skincare! Seriously, invest this 5 minutes in yourself and you’re going to feel like a new woman. I know there’s all this societal pressure on women to stay young but don’t do it with society in mind do it for yourself, who doesn’t like to feel like a freshly bathed baby??

TOP TIP: Find a routine that works for you, there’s loads of different brands out there that come in all different price ranges, and if you’re lucky enough to have pretty low maintenance skin you won’t have to pay the stars and the moon for a smooth complexion!

Final thoughts…

I know this may seem overwhelming to even implement one of these tips but start slow and if you can only do one that’s fine, because as said at the start you don’t have to do everything at one time!

REMEMBER: Self care is not selfish, and if you really want to be the best mother you can be take time to replenish your soul, and this positive energy will overflow into those around you too, because you cannot pour from an empty cup.